Molly’s Diary: Unyielding

Unyielding.

Relentless.

A tightness in my chest.

The feeling of a hand, reaching into my throat, and tugging at my guts with the undeniability of a runaway tractor-trailer barreling down a long, straight grade or a jackhammer cutting through steaming pavement right outside my window

Is it possible to want so deeply, to need so much? Is it survivable, this degree of longing?

I catch myself holding my breath, wanting the world, needing to be filled, waiting to be pushed beyond limits I thought were impassible, to be opened wider than I imagined possible.

Dangerous for the person who would dare respond, fill, push, open. Once opened, I will not be denied. My desire will not be contained. My actions will not be disciplined.

I will take. I will consume. I will engulf.

Burning up, flooding out, an unavoidable and mutually assured annihilation.

And then, in the space between gasping breaths and silence, a moment of oblivion and rest.

But only a moment, and then desire starts to seep back in, consciousness awakening to the building tide of want and need.

Unyielding.

Relentless.

~ by Molly Montrevoir on June 10, 2008.

5 Responses to “Molly’s Diary: Unyielding”

  1. Oh my, Molly.

    I’m not sure I dare even post a comment.

    Well, I’ve never been known as timid, have I?

    Both. Frackin’. Feet.

    Swallow me whole.

  2. Timid? You? Not a chance! You would walk into the den of a bear just as it was waking from hibernation if there was something in there you wanted badly enough.

    In fact, I think that’s just what you’ve done.

    Waking hungry,
    Molly

  3. You really did wake hungry, didn’t you?

    Kisses,
    JanieBelle

  4. Ravenous. Ravenous and propelled much more by instinct than by reason.
    xoxo,
    Molly

  5. I think I like the sound of that.

    Yes. Yes, I very much do.

    Kisses,
    JanieBelle

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